In No Words Or Less
A life with horses and photographyArchive for November, 2005
finding my feet
Sometimes I take on too much. Trying to help too many people all at once.
I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now.
I have been asked to work for the vet in December, and now Cath also needs me to be “available” between christmas and new years – “just in case” her casuals let her down.
And Cath is one person I really don’t want to let down. She has too much on her own plate right now.
I had to walk to the embassy, as the parking lots are still not built! It wasn’t far, I suppose.
I parked Blue Betty at the shopping centre and threw my bag thingy over my shoulder and walked up the hill in the rain. Well actually it wasn’t _rain_ it was occasional gigantic drops that you could actually dodge.
Splopping rain.
So I have an interview now, next week. I’m strangely nervous. I shouldn’t be, because I have nothing to hide. But they make such a Big Deal about this whole thing. It’s just a blooming visa. It’s silly, I think.
There’s a whole special form you have to fill in if you are male and 18 to 45 years old. Odd huh? And another special form if you are a student or going on a “vocational” visit.
I am none of the above, so I only had the one form to worry about.
And another photo. I hate photos.
Let me clarify: I hate photos of MYSELF. I love photos.
I love to TAKE photos.
I guess that’s what’s so depressing to me about this whole Trying To Make A Living thing. I feel like I’m watching myself from outside my body. Waiting to fail.
So I can laugh at myself for even THINKING that anything good would happen to me.
I can be quite mean that way.
Years of cynical self-abuse. Masochism.
And now I must try to sleep.
But I’m thirsty now. Damnit.
night.
Feeling low
Just a little down at the moment.
Looks like the Canon thing didn’t come through.
So there goes the stock photography site.
I got denied for a loan.
I have bills to pay and no money to pay them.
Everyone and his dog has a camera these days, at the shows. So why do I bother?
And at the Fishbone, I was so alone. I had no backup.
These other photographers had stands and caravans and they sat in the arena… while I sit on the outside, trying to get the best angle.
*sigh*
I just don’t know if it’s worth it anymore.
I don’t know if I can go back to office life. I think I’d go mad within a few days, actually.
I’m just not an office person.
I’m lost.
Today I take Blue Betty out for her drive – going to the bank and then to the embassy to start the visa thing.
That should cheer me up a little. That car is awesome to drive.
As they say “sheer driving pleasure” and they mean it.
Counting down the days.
Fishbone – Sunday 27 November 2005 – Show Jumping
This is Lindenberg.
He is a large, gentle warmblood stallion.
He is owned and ridden by Gail Foxcroft. They are sponsored by Cathedral Peak Hotels
Tragedy at Fishbone
The day started out great… then around 12:30pm, a horse died.
His name was Go Well, and he was a beautiful big 12 year old grey warmblood stallion.
He had a heartattack. Right there in the warm up arena.
He was waiting to go in for the next round, being ridden by his warmup rider, Paul.
He belonged to the lady building the courses today, Anne-Marie.
And before you think “steroids”, let me just say No. A lot of warmbloods are born with heart defects (usually a heart murmur) and in 95% of the time none of them are ever affected by this. Unfortunately Go Well was.
He’d just jumped an enormous A Grade course and was being cooled between rounds.
It was horrific.
And because he was such a big horse (about 850kg or so) he couldn’t be moved without a crane. So there he lies, in the warmup arena, with a plastic cover over him.
Until they can get a crane to move him. And he comes from Gauteng, not from Cape Town. So he has to travel all the way back up country to get buried.
My heart just breaks for Anne-Marie.
I will upload a photo of him when i get a chance.
So after that, i had a little difficulty concentrating.
Did my best.
wrapped in
Still smiling.
Went to C’s shop to fix her printer/laptop once and for all.
I installed my old HP, and gee gosh darnit the programs ALL WORKED!
Everything printed.
From IE to IQ.
*sigh*
So I left the printer there and told L to get some real paper for it, and a new ink cartridge.
I then went off to the Fishbone show (everyone in the riding community still calls it BOE) to have a look.
I only took about 60 photos of the B Grade show jumping – more of a practice for tomorrow.
I was..distracted and restless.
Counting down the days.
Trying not to grin too much.
Spoke to C at the show, and explained the whole printer thing “The Dot Matrix Must Go.”
She said what a pity, etc, and I said she could have a DM printer if she could find a direct USB one.
I do understand that the ink for the HP would get expensive. But it was pretty light on ink, even with the colour ones.
Mum made delicious lasagne tonight – it was really good. Had icecream too. Waiting for the headache.
My hip aches… so i think it’s going to rain.
wow what an exciting life i lead.
Crepuscular…
I got this as my word of the day recently…
I don’t know why, but I _like_ it!
Twilight is my favourite time of the day, and I really wake up then… so I thought it was apt.
Plus I’m a little dim 
crepuscular \krih-PUS-kyuh-luhr\, adjective:
1. Of, pertaining to, or resembling twilight; dim.
2. (Zoology) Appearing or active at twilight.
We had another big power failure today – weeeee 3 hours of NO TEA!
So I washed the dishes… and tidied my desk and papers… and then went outside to get a tan
I fell asleep in the sunshine, but luckily I had slathered myself in suncream, so I didn’t get burnt at all.
So when I woke up, I was groggy and lazy and not quite with it.
I didn’t go ride, because Jamz bailed on me. She had a doctors appointment (poor kid has terrible pain in her ear.. sounds like an infection) at 4:30pm, and a dance social at 7pm. So we couldn’t ride later either. *shrug*
Excellente’ will be fine, perhaps M will ride him this weekend… (I kinda hope not, because he’s always in such a bad mood on the Monday after she rides – I’d rather have a fresh horse than a grumpy horse.)
I should stop grinning at some point.
It’s making my cheeks hurt.
Professionally speaking…
I spent the morning fixing a laptop and trying to make things print on a DOT MATRIX (say it with me “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?”) printer.
I can’t understand why C wants to use this thing… it’s just hideous.
Yes, the tractor is fun to watch…
Yes, it makes a cool *wrrrrrrrrrr* *skreeeeeeeeeeeee* *wrrrrrrrrrrrrrr* noise…
BUT!
It refuses to print more than one document, before throwing up its hands in an entirely french way and saying “I WILL DO NO MORE!”
You then have to switch it off and on or you have to close the laptop and reopen it…
How odd is that?
So i am dragging my HP into C’s shop tomorrow (when i drop off photos and go ride) and telling her “Try this. If that program works with this, get RID of the DM please!”
I demo’d two POS programs to L, so she could show C later (C was off doing saddle fittings). L preferred the Original.. go figure.
Well actually i prefer the original as well…
It’s less complicated. Which C will like. She hates complicated.
She says I annoy her… but in a good way.
She’s a nut.
Well the Fishbone show started today… I’ll go on Saturday and Sunday and take photos… i need a break. I was totally exhausted after the last 4 day show. i can’t do that again soon.
Also, i’m riding tomorrow! And i won’t miss that for the world…
Well… i might be missing that in January… but that’s a whole other story… *grin*
moving day
I have decided that i like wordpress . It is Neat.
so there i have moved.
yay me!
http://whiskeykitten.wordpress.com/
enjoy!
from the horses mouth
Excellente’ and Alchemy had their teeth done today (i took photos, of course) and the difference in their whole attitude and going after that, was just awesome!
Al’s teeth were so bad that he was no longer eating. Jamz and I noticed because of the drool coming out of his mouth all the time, and the fact he was leaving his food. Very unlike Al.
So Jeremy (the farrier/dentist) said we should definitely still go ride, so we set out.
It was a glorious, sunny afternon and the boys were stepping out happily.
( I took more photos – with a retro camera though, so these will have to be developed still. I used Holga today)
I discovered that I have 15 cameras.
Fifteen. One Five.
And those are just the cameras I can remember. (*taps metal plate*)
These of course include 2 camera phones (my old and my new) and a webcam…
But they are still cameras…
Is that too many cameras for one person?
I love my lomos… (www.lomography.com) and of course my digital is the best thing ever (Kodak DX7590)
But I am wondering if I should feel …guilty for having so many cameras?
They are accumulated over many years… one of them is nearly 70 years old… but it still takes the most incredible shots. I use it for black & white. My uncle gave it to me when i turned 21, he got it from his dad when he turned 21… so it’s been around a while.
well… more as I remember…
